Mindset

You’re Not Alone Battling Imposter Syndrome

I originally sat down and wrote this to you about two hours before I took the stage for 350 insurance industry leaders at a conference in Nebraska. Odd time to write an article, right?

Then Covid-19 hit the nation and changed everything, so I decided to shelf this post. I had planned to keep it in the drafts until I received a few messages from some of you about not feeling qualified enough to start *that* project. It was the perfect reminder of the one thing high-achievers all face:

Feeling like you’re about to be “found out” and kicked out.

Here’s a moment of transparency for me that I wanted you to know what I mentally deal with prior to a keynote presentation.

I had given that specific keynote presentation at least thirty times in the last two years. I actually got this specific gig because someone saw me give this talk in October and referred me to the client. It’s my second most popular talk, which means I should be 100% confident in it, right?

I wasn’t.

You see, every time I’m preparing to speak I face imposter syndrome. Yes, even a few years into this business I hear the whispers that say “you don’t belong.” I spent this morning rehearsing my gig for the 20th time in the past few weeks. I know my content. I know I’ve practiced. I know I’m ready – but that still doesn’t stop the voices.

• What if my content isn’t actually that good and I’m a fraud?
• What if this is the audience that doesn’t laugh at any of your jokes?
• What if…what if…what if…

That (evil little) voice will try to convince you that you don’t belong. Here’s the thing – every single high achiever hears that voice.

They just refuse to let that voice stop them.

Imposter syndrome isn’t common among people who settle. The ones who are content to keep things “as is” don’t hear it, nor do those who give a crap effort.

It’s only people who are stepping outside of their comfort zone to try and do something bigger or new that hear it. Which means that every time you hear the voice of Imposter Syndrome it should signal to you that YOU’RE ON THE RIGHT PATH.

That voice’s appearance means you’re growing.

Right now, many of you have more time on your hands than you’re used to. You keep toying with that idea of starting a blog, building a side hustle, or even just using this time to step up and encourage others with videos or short posts. But then you stop.

You hear the whispers that “other people are more qualified to do it, so why would anyone want to hear from you” and you listen to them. So you do nothing.

You let the voices win when you do nothing, but in reality, they’re wrong.

The sound of that voice should remind you that you’re preparing to step outside of your comfort zone – and to embrace this moment as the chance to get better.

Average people would hear that voice and let it talk them out of doing anything of value. Competitors hear that voice, acknowledge they’re on the right path, and then get to work.

When I hear that voice, I immediately:

• Start my positive self-talk (audibly).
• Remind myself of the intentional rehearsal work I’ve put in for hours for this. I know I’m ready.
• Control my breathing.
• Talk back to that voice. I remind it that I’ve done this talk before and when I step on the stage, it’s my opportunity to help others and improve my work.

If I can remind myself that I’m prepared for the moment and that the talk isn’t actually about how good I look (but how much can I help the audience), that voice tends to shut itself up.

It’ll work the same for you, too.

More than anything, right now this world needs people to step up and use their voice. We need more encouragement, more helping hands, and more art/business/music/things created. We need imposter syndromes silenced so leaders – leaders just like you – can step up and lead.

Don’t let the voice of Imposter Syndrome stop you. Let it signal that you’re on the right path and then put your head down and get to work.

I’m cheering for you.

Backup Ready

This past Sunday, future Hall of Fame NFL quarterbacks Drew Brees and Ben Roethlisberger went down with injuries. Multiple other starters are battling injuries and out for a game or the season, including Cam Newton, Nick Foles, Sam Darnold, and Trevor Siemeon.

Every NFL team’s fate lies in the hands of their quarterback, the most important position in the sport. And now, multiple teams are scrambling to get their backup ready to play so the season isn’t lost in Week 2. Some of those backups will step in and shine, but others won’t. Why?

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Four Ways to Cultivate Your Winning Mindset

The road to success is a long one. Successful people continually understand that the starting point to any victory is in their mind.

I’m not promoting the theory that “if you believe it’ll happen, it’ll happen” because that’s a false reality painted on society. I am promoting that to win you need to build a winning mindset for the road it’ll take to get that win.

This mindset is what allows leaders the ability to rebound from setbacks, continually grow, and seemingly be unwavering in their commitment to succeeding. 

Just like your skills, a Winning Mindset isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you intentionally build every day.

Here are four ways you can build your own Winning Mindset every day:

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Are You Playing Fantasy Football with Your Career?

Football season has returned, and with it, fantasy football.

It’s the time of year when more than 59 million North Americans invest more than $7 billion into individual players’ performances every Sunday during NFL season. And inevitably, your weekly bragging rights will come down to the last quarter of Monday Night Football. It doesn’t matter how much money you have, how big of a network you’ve built, or how many social media followers you’ve accumulated – none of that influences whether you’ll win your weekly matchup or the league that season.

Rich or poor – your fate rests in the hands of professional athletes who don’t even know who you are.

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It’s Just Like Burpees

Why would anyone ever smile after doing burpees?

That’s the question I asked myself as I walked to my car after finishing a 500-burpee workout. Woof.

It was rough. I was soaked in sweat and my arms were still trembling thirty minutes later from the work.

But I was all smiles as I walked out of the gym Saturday morning because I was proud of myself for doing that awful work – especially when going into it, I was questioning whether I could.

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Winning Their Approval

I remember being made fun of during middle school for “flooding.” The “cool” girl who sat behind me reminded me daily that it wasn’t raining ?

(Thank you growth spurt).

I remember that also being a big turning point in my life where I suddenly became super self-conscious of what I wore and incredibly concerned with what everyone else thought of me.

And more so, concerned with doing what I could to be liked by them.

This negative mindset (trying to win others’ approval and care what they thought) carried itself with me throughout most of my young adulthood. And it was DRAINING.

You’ll never be enough (cool, fit, stylish, rich, etc…) for some people.

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Lessons a Kid Entrepreneur Taught Me

I was fortunate to have coffee recently with a fourth-grade entrepreneur who’s out to make a difference.

Ainsley started her bath soaps’ business to raise money for her pastor’s wife who was undergoing cancer treatments. I LOVED hearing her passion for creating different kinds of soap in order to sell and donate profits to help with the mounting medical bills.

Despite being the one sharing advice on starting a business, I was reminded of some powerful truths by this young lady – and what we can all learn from the conversation:

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Growing Your Confidence is Like Building a House

Most of us become quite frustrated because unlike that fictional movie character, the process to growing our own confidence takes much longer than two hours.

And most of us quit trying, believing the lie that “it’s just not for us.” But the truth is, it is for you.

To Make 2019 Great, Do This First

I explore what you need to do with last year before you can make 2019 your best year yet.

Learn the mindset that Competitors have when heading into a new year, and how you too can take this mindset to set yourself up for unparalleled growth in 2019.

Why You Need to Be a Legend In Your Own Mind

Former NFL and Super Bowl Champion quarterback Trent Dilfer shared his story recently on a podcast. During the interview, he was asked how he handled the period of his career in Tampa where he was being openly booed in public by fans for the team’s poor performance. Dilfer laughed and replied that to be a winner in the league, you have to believe you’re a legend in your own mind.

He wasn’t making the case for blind arrogance, or an unwillingness to learn and get better, but instead, reinforcing the fact that you must be self-confident in order to be successful in life.

Here’s why.